• Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Olesia Ulianova

Soft skills Trainer and Education Manager

  • UA

Confident Behavior — A Skill for the Future

April 17, 2020 By Olesia Ulianova

🌍 Three Perspectives on Reality

How we perceive life events defines both our effectiveness and emotional well-being.
There are three main ways of looking at the world:

1️⃣ “Person of the Past”
Accepts the situation and avoids change:

“It’s fine, that’s how it is now. Things used to be better, but what can you do.”
A passive mindset that avoids growth.

2️⃣ “Person of the Future”
Rejects the current state and pushes for rapid change:

“I don’t like this. I’ll work harder to make things happen faster.”
An active but restless mindset, often driven by impatience.

3️⃣ “Person of the Present”
Accepts reality but believes in improvement:

“I’m okay with how things are now, and I believe it will get better.”
This is the mindset of proactivity and awareness — calm yet forward-looking.

A proactive person doesn’t depend on external conditions for happiness.
They aren’t afraid to stand alone, be misunderstood, or go against the crowd —
because they know that everything they need for happiness is already within them.

💬 Algorithm for Expressing Feelings

Assertive communication is about expressing both positive and negative emotions openly, yet respectfully.

🔹 1. Don’t postpone.
Speak as soon as something affects you.

🔹 2. Use “I” statements.
Say “I feel hurt”, not “You offended me.”

🔹 3. Describe the action, not the person.
Focus on facts: “When you raised your voice…”

🔹 4. Name your emotion clearly.
Be precise: “I’m disappointed”, “I’m grateful.”

🔹 5. Express what you want.
Clarify expectations: “Next time, please let me know in advance.”

This is the essence of assertiveness — standing up for yourself without hostility.

🧍‍♀️ The Confidence Corset

Before meetings, negotiations, or public speaking, put on your “confidence corset” —
a mental and physical state that radiates calm strength.

🔸 What is it?
In psychology, it means building habits that project self-assurance.

🔹 Eye contact — steady and calm, showing presence.
🔹 Voice — controlled tone, balanced pace, expressive but not rushed.
🔹 Body language — upright posture, open gestures, relaxed expression.

🌟 Confidence Is a Trained Skill

Confidence doesn’t appear naturally — it’s the result of consistent inner work.
Posture training, mindful breathing, and self-awareness exercises strengthen it daily.

Stand tall, straighten your shoulders, lift your chin, and smile.
When your body feels strong, your mind follows.

The world isn’t on your shoulders — it’s at your feet.

⚠️ Enemies of Confidence

Doubt, fear, comparison, and inner criticism — they all drain confidence.
But they lose power when you stay present, self-aware, and grounded.
True confidence begins not in your words, but in your state of being.

Comments

Filed Under: Soft Skills Tagged With: assertiveness, soft skills

Primary Sidebar

ABOUT

Olesia Ulianova

Ph.D., MBA, CEO of Telesens, Founder of IT Grow Center (ITGC)

I am a trainer, coach, and leader with over 15 years of experience at the intersection of technology, management, and people development.

My mission is to help leaders and teams become more effective, adaptable, and self-aware in a world that changes every single day.

🔹 Ph.D. in Technical Sciences and General MBA — a combination of systems thinking and strategic management.
🔹 CEO of Telesens — over a decade of experience in IT business development, organizational transformation, and building high-performance teams.
🔹 Founder of IT Grow Center (ITGC) — a space where future managers, trainers, and leaders grow.
🔹 MBA in Business Psychology — a deep understanding of human behavior, motivation, and management psychology that helps build mature teams and lead change effectively.
🔹 Author of the “Antimanager. Soft Skills Guideline” series — a trilogy on personal development, communication, and leadership.
🔹 Member of the International Association of MBAs (UK)
🔹 Certified Coach (ACSTH/ACTP) and former USAID mentor.

 

My approach is built on a simple belief:

“Everything is possible. The impossible just takes a little longer.”

I believe that growth begins with an honest dialogue with yourself, and actual effectiveness starts with inner balance.

In my blog, I share practical tools, transformation stories, and proven methods that help managers and leaders act consciously, avoid burnout, and achieve more — both in business and in life

SOCIAL NETWORKS

  • E-mail
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • LinkedIn

TAGS

adaptability assertiveness book bottleneck bullying change management coaching communication conflicts delegation discipline effective leadership effective learning emotional intelligence empathy feedback first impression flexible management human resources KPI leadership management management principles motivation organisational behaviour personal effectiveness personality types personal transformation persuasion planning prioritisation proactivity professional burnout project management soft skills strategic management strategy stress stress management successes and failures team time management toxicity understanding особиста ефективність

RECENT

Mentorship and Coaching: The Most Powerful Tools for Employee Growth

June 26, 2026

Agile Methodologies: The Future of Project Management in a Fast-Changing World

May 22, 2026

Creative Thinking in Management: The New Competitive Advantage

April 24, 2026

Time Management in the Digital Era: How to Stay Focused in a Noisy World

March 20, 2026

Copyright © 2023 Olesia Ulianova